Our Best

So, Lovies, it's 4 am and I just rolled out of bed with great excitement and fear because it's today now, and today is the day I have tell you about Evy's fundraiser.

Evy's fundraiser was such a ridiculously magical and sacred evening that it seems absolutely impossible to explain. But I'll try.

Sunday evening, Leigha and Lou and I arrived at this little cafe outside of Fredericksburg, which from the outside reminded me of Santa's Workshop.

It was just like Santa's workshop on the inside, too, because upon entry we were greeted by joyful elves scurrying around and shiny gifts everywhere.

And then there was Andrea, who I guess would be Santa, if Santa were quite hot and businesslike and blonde and sassy. Andrea was running the show alongside her aunt and uncle. Her aunt and uncle came from Chicago to help Andie with Evy's fundraiser. Yes, they did.

There you go. There they are. Jill and Brian. Evy's parents. This is what they looked like all evening. Laughing, gorgeous, bright and shiny and peaceful, peaceful. I know because I stared at them a lot.

A writer from the Huffington Post contacted me recently because she wants to do a story about Evy. She asked about Jill and Brian and I told her this:

I've only met Jill and Brian once. But if you are looking for a family to help raise awareness and hope for pediatric cancer, you've found your family. Jill and Brian are sharp as tacks and easy to be with and very clearly in love with each other and life. They are funny, too. . . really funny. And their girls, OH THEIR GIRLS. Look at their pictures. I'll leave it at that.

Monkees, Jill and Brian are the stuff.

Monkee Julie worked the door, collecting the entrance fees. She held a bag full of money that will help send Evy to camp. Monkees, meet Julie, one of your Monkee embassadors to Evy's family. Here is what Julie is: She is one of those people who makes you feel wonderful. She does not try to make you feel like she is wonderful. I have learned that there is a difference. Love you, Julie.

The Lou and The Chimmy. My sisters. Great shirt huh? I am always very careful to take it off before I set foot in my kitchen.

This is Sue Ann, Monkees. Meet Our Sue Ann. Sue Ann told me that she was nervous to come to the fundraiser, because social things make her anxious and she considers herself to be a wallflower. But Sue Ann explained that her husband is a Marine, and Marines have this honor code. When one of them falls, everybody arrives to pick up the fallen one. You show up for each other, Sue Ann told me, even when it's hard to show up.

Oh, I squeaked out. Oh.

Thank you, Sue Ann.

And Susie. Here's our Susie Q, with her little one. Whom she introduced as "Rosemary's baby." I love Susie. My kind of girl.

Check out Rosemary's baby's T-shirt, please.

Meet Rachelle and her precious family. Her little one, Skylar was one of my preschool students. I love this family. But since they have a newborn and live two hours away, I didn't expect to see them on Sunday night. Expect Miracles.

I was holding it together pretty well until I heard the door open and saw these two walk in.

Monkees, meet Sunny and Tom. You might know him as "Tattoo Tom."

Sunny and I used to play together when we were little. And then life started happening and we lost each other. A lot of life happened to Sunny while we were apart. The list of hits she's taken is long and sacred and private, but let's just say that she's a fighter. Sunny fights like a girl every single day. And I love her very, very much. And I love her husband, Tom, too. Because they are brave and strong and loving, but also because when I see Sunny she reminds me of being little and free and unafraid of what life might bring and just loving my friend because she was my friend.

We just didn't know, did we, Sunny? We didn't know how hard it would all be.

But we didn't know how tough we were either, did we, Sunny?

And so when I saw Sunny and Tom walk through the door, I cried. Because they are the last people I expected to show up at Evy's fundraiser. They have five young children at home, and one in heaven. They lost Shayla to cancer when she was eighteen, and so I thought it would be much too hard for them to be at Evy's.

But Tom said, "I would do anything for that little girl. Yes, it's hard to be here, but I couldn't not be here."

And so even though money and time and energy are scarce these days . . . Sunny and Tom found a sitter and got in the car and drove and drove and drove to be there. To stand there. That's all that was required. And Sunny brought Jill this:

Oh Jesus, Monkees. It was all just too much for my little heart to handle.

There was a bidding war on Kristi's We Can Do Hard Things Sign. I think it ended up going for $100.

Lou won this beautiful set of...I don't know what they are actually. Housey things.

Listen. This thing is not a toothbrush holder for an orphanage. And you should not suggest that it might be in front of a large group of people. Just trust me on that one. It'll be embarrassing.

It's a vase, people. A vase. Whatever. Would have been my last guess.

I got in a bidding war with another lady for this purple bag. I was trying to win it for my baby Sister. When I told a Monkee this, she said, "Isn't Sister doing legal mission work in Africa?" And I said, "Listen, heroes need fancy handbags, too."

So all night I fought for this bag, Sister. All night I would tell myself: "Self! Stop thinking about the purple bag . . .think about EVY. Evy, Evy, Evy." And at the last second the lady I was battling swooped in and wrote down the winning bid. And I was so mad I thought about Fighting Her Like a Girl but then decided maybe that wasn't completely in the spirit of the evening. Sorry, sister. This bag would've gone really well with your . . . I don't know . . .sandals?

Anyway, the swoopy bidding lady told me she liked my shirt later, so I forgave her.

This is Alyssa, Evy's physical trainer. I loved her right away because she approached me and said, "Excuse me, can I ask you something? Random people keep tapping me on the shoulder and whispering . . . are you a Monkee? I'm so confused. Do you have any idea what they're talking about?"

Hi Alyssa! Are you there, Alyssa? Welcome!

Leigha and Chimmy. I shall put one in my left pocket and one in my right pocket and I shall be happy forever.

I have no idea who these women are, I just found them positively delightful, and asked for a picture.

Kay. These are the Carmichals. These are Declan's parents. When I saw the Carmichals, I felt exactly how I feel when I see a group of soldiers at the airport. I felt proud, reverent, grateful, and full of awe and respect.

A very new Monkee . . . Hi Stephanie! Warm and comforting and sweet and wonderful, this one. Like hot chocolate.

And . . . Meghan.

You guys are gonna want to meet Monkee Meghan. After two minutes I felt like maybe Meghan and I had been friends for two decades. Hilarious, passionate, generous and precious as the day is long. Drove hours to be there. Love you, Meghan.

While Andrea was giving this toast, which was too heartbreakingly beautiful to try to re-create, I was thinking:

I wish all my Monkees could have a friend like Andrea.

But then I thought. Well . . .

All the Monkees could be a friend like Andrea.

I don't know how to do justice to the beauty of the evening. How to describe how it changed the world for me, helped me figure some important things out. How it proved to me that despite some evidence to the contrary . . . the world is, in fact, a place where people who don't even know one another take care of one another. Where we are all brothers and sisters. Where just showing up for each other is all it takes.

Luckily, Tattoo Tom is brilliant, and he figured out how to sum it all up.

Everytime I passed by Tom at the fundraiser, I would grab his arm or give him a hug, because I feel like Tom and Sunny are people who should be honored. One time I stopped and asked Tom if he was doing all right, if all of this was too hard, if it was bringing back too many memories of his beautiful daughter, Shayla.

And Tom said this:

"You know, G. It's weird. When I think back to that time, the time when Shayla was dying, I realize that it was the happiest time in my life. Every morning I woke up and I knew exactly what my purpose was. I knew exactly where I was supposed to be, who I was supposed to be with, and what I was supposed to be doing. My relationship with my daughter was real during that time, it was perfect and simple. I have never been at my best like I was during that time."

I cannot stop thinking about that.

What we want, all we want is to know what we are supposed to be doing down here, right?

Tom and Sunny know. Jill and Brian know. The Carmichals know. Andrea knows.

We are supposed to be caring for each other. That's when we are real, perfect, simple, happy. That's when we are at our best.

God Bless Evy and God Bless Us, Every One.

Love, G and TWMF (The Whole Monkee Family)